Hey kittenpants-ers!

Welcome to the newest issue of the KP news. This month we've got more articles than ever before, more features than ever before, and more writers than we can shake a stick at. Believe me, I've tried!

I'm so tired. 

So much has been happening--the KP staff got taken to awesome school 2 times this week! First, Modern Humorist published our collection of celebrity Knock-knock jokes!  Seeing is believing, so check it out. Then read this month's KP article of the same title for our less edited, slightly more graphic version.

Second, the lovely folks at Punchline Magazine published a story I wrote forever ago called "How to Have the Perfect Week". It's published under the super secret pseudonym "K. Pants".

And then there's this new issue of KP--it has kept me busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest. You know, I actually used that expression in conversation with a one-legged man I met in New Orleans. He said he would kick my ass if he caught me cheating at pool. I said he would be as busy as a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest. He laughed.  He was awesome. 

I had another encounter with a strange old man that I though was fascinating. I went  to a deli to buy lunch and cigarettes. I was standing by the door - gorgeous day out - waiting for my hot dog, while a man in his 60s (ish) was sitting, reading a newspaper and eating a sandwich. We hadn't spoken a word to each other since I came in - not even a "Hello." The deli was fairly quiet, except the radio was on and "Hotel California" started playing. As the chorus approached, the man looked at me and we both simultaneously started singing "welcome to the Hotel California". Out loud! Then he sang "Such a lovely place" and I followed with "Such a lovely face..."  We laughed, a bell rang, my hot dog was ready and I left.

It was the coolest thing ever.