Who will protect the line from cutters?

Who will point out the "nerds" carrying swords at LORD OF THE RINGS?

Who will correct me when I don't know that it's "Dumbledore" ("Not Dumbledorf! Duh!")?

Who will say "Eminem!" with me every time we hang up the phone, as if that makes sense?

Who will see The Strokes on a street corner and mistake them for our friend Will?

Who will tell stories of Bronson Pinchot's yellow house?

Who will tell me all about last week's episode of "Buffy" even though I don't care?

Who will I talk to while I wait for the precise moment to introduce myself to Andy Richter?

Who will drink all the root beer I buy in one sitting, if I ask him to?

Who will buy me the same birthday presents that Andy Flowers does every year, becoming Andy's arch enemy?

Who will make me mix tapes with secret hidden themes?

Who will talk on the phone with me when I am bored or sad, even if he doesn't want to, even if he is naked on the couch watching "Gilmore Girls"?

Who will be happy that an accordion version of "Sweet Child of Mine" made me cry?

Who will know who Buckethead is?

Who will make fun of Seattle with me?

Who?!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't go.

Love,
Darci