Love, Aniston Style
Professional nobody, Michael Baroni, is selling the evidence of his teenage fling with Jennifer Aniston on eBay for, like, a hundred grand or so. We at kittenpants are perfectly happy to give it up for free, (and Planned Parenthood can vouch for that). So we dug through our hope chest and found Jen's other love letters.

***

Dear Tate Donovan:
When I got you that recurring role on Friends I thought we'd be together forever. I guess I can understand why you’d want to leave me behind for your movie career. America loved you in THE CUTTING EDGE. Wait, no that was D.B. Sweeney. Were you in RED DAWN? I know I recognize you from something...

No, no. Don’t tell me. I’ll think of it.
Jenn

***

Dear Brad Pitt:
What the fuck? Were you fucking the sofa last night?

~JA~

***

Dear Michael Baroni:
I’m having a great time at drama camp this summer. I got the best spot in the talent show and my monologue rules! I just know I’ll be discovered – maybe someday this letter will be worth something!! Hold on to it – if they ever invent a worldwide web for communicating globally, then capitalize on that with a company that offers quirky items for public auction, see if you can't get a few bucks.

Smooch,
Jennifer J. Aniston

***

Dear Tom Skerrit:
You have some marmalade in your moustache.

I love you.
Jenn

***

Being on the west coast means getting beat to the punch sometimes. xo,Kittenpants.

Feel free to submit your own links/comments.