Dear kittenpants

Dear kittenpants:
A long time ago I wrote some funny letters and I have always loved your site. Today is the 3rd week since I've moved to new york city and I am interested in joining the KP army. Is there a recruiter's office anywhere in astoria?

Henry

Dear Henry:
To join, rent the movie NIGHT OF THE COMET, write down every third word, and follow the resulting instructions.

You wouldn't believe what we want from you. In your worst nightmare you wouldn't believe.
xoxo,
kittenpants

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